James Douglas (Doug) Pender

May 4, 1946 – January 12, 2024 (at the age of 77)

May 4, 1946 – January 12, 2024 (at the age of 77)

Well, Dad, after all these years of you looking at the obituaries and jokingly saying you’re not there yet your turn has now arrived, but we weren’t ready.

Dad passed away at Victoria General Hospital after suffering a very sudden and catastrophic medical emergency. Dad held on for 5 days until we were with Mom at her care home instead of at his bedside. I’m sure he had that planned. It was his way of making sure we will fulfill our promise to always look after Mom. Dad was born in Ottawa, Ontario to Gladys and Patrick Pender and was the oldest of 5 siblings. Predeceased by both his parents, and brothers Brian and Earl, he leaves to mourn his loss his wife Donna of 55 years; daughter Elizabeth (Ron) of Victoria; son Gene (Lisa) and grandsons Declan and Liam of Sidney; sister Joan Beaton (Ken) of Ottawa; and brother Ted (Theresa) of Ottawa; sister-in-law Kim Pender of Ottawa; and sisters-in-law Lorna Morcombe, Sylvia Elias and Gail Rab all of Ottawa; as well as many nieces and nephews on both sides of the extended family. Over the years, even through distance or disagreements with his siblings or family may have happened, Dad took his job as the oldest very seriously. Sometimes he had a funny way of showing it, but Joan and Ted please know that Dad has always loved you, as well as Earl and Brian. Dad also leaves to mourn his passing many, many long-time dear friends; old friends who became new friends again; amazing neighbours; and new friends Dad would meet on his many walks around the neighbourhood.

Dad attended St. Pat’s Catholic School in Lower Town Ottawa (where he met his long-time friend Paul Bourke) and then on to Lisgar Collegiate also with Paul. Dad would always talk about having to bob and weave his way to school through the French gang neighbourhoods of Lower Town to get there. Sounded like quite the rough part of town.

After graduating, and a few years later, Dad came west to B.C. in 1966 after Paul (who already came here in 1965) talked about how beautiful it was. Dad instantly fell in love with it. And I’m so glad he did. I love it here too. Paul, Dad and Brian McLean got an apartment together in Burnaby, but then Paul bought a house at 750 Boundary Road, so they all moved there. I think Dad drew the short straw (no pun intended) and he ended up getting the room in the basement close to the furnace with the odd rat to keep him company at night. It was through Paul and the rest of the “750 Gang” that Dad made lifelong friends including Ray, Brian and Mike – just to name a few. He attended Simon Fraser University but keep in mind that SFU was still a fairly new university then, and Dad would tell you that the entry requirements weren’t that high at the time which is the only reason why he got in. He went there with the goal of getting his English degree, but didn’t complete it until many years later because he got itchy feet and decided to take a job in Medicine Hat Alberta as a journalist in 1968/69. This is where he met Mom, the love of his life. They were introduced by mutual friends over a tennis match, and Dad lost badly to Mom. He threw his racquet, but Mom ended up marrying him anyway.

Dad’s journalism career took off which took them all across this great country of ours before firmly putting down roots in Victoria in 1981. Dad worked for many papers including Medicine Hat News, Saskatoon Star Phoenix, Fredericton Gleaner, Edmonton Journal, Ottawa Citizen, Victoria Colonist, Canadian Press, then Victoria Times Colonist. After leaving journalism, Dad became a public relations officer for the government and eventually opened up his own consulting business.

Dad will always be remembered for his quick wit, one-liners and, sometimes, black humour which always put a smile on people’s faces. Dad would always come up to me and ask me to pull his finger, and I’d fall for it every time. He loved the outdoors, hiking, gardening, and in his earlier years, skiing. It was because of you, Dad, that I learned how to ski. Dad was also an amazing cook who was always trying to make something different and fancy – like a terrine – to feed friends and family. I am forever grateful for getting Dad to teach me how to make one of his terrines this past Christmas. Thanks Dad.

Rest now and be at peace. We love you Dad/Doug/Uncle Doug/Pop/Rocky.

The family would also like to thank the BC Ambulance Paramedics, VGH emergency room doctors and nurses, and the nurses on 6C North for all your care and compassion for Dad, and us as a family, during this very difficult time.

A Memorial service was held in the Sequoia Centre at McCall Gardens, 4665 Falaise Drive, Victoria, BC on Friday, January 26, 2024 at 2:00 pm.

To view the service please click the video below:

Tribute Slideshow:

Condolences may be offered to the family below.

McCall Gardens
www.mccallgardens.com

 

25 Responses

  1. Alec and I had the fortune to meet Donna and Doug when we moved from Pender Island to Bow Road in 2017. I remember Doug bringing his grandchildren to our door that Halloween and introducing himself. Of course I laughed at the coincidence of his surname! We met Donna soon afterwards and thats when we knew we had moved to a great neighbourhood. Doug and Donna always had time for a chat when we were outside working in our garden and it was always a pleasure to stop and talk when we met them on their daily walks. Doug was funny and smart and really cared when he asked “…how are you?”. He always had a kind word for our enthusiastic labrador dog and even brought dog biscuits to slip her on the sly! Such a gentleman and such a good neighbour. We will miss you Doug and our heartfelt sympathy to your family and especially to Donna.

  2. Glad I was able to visit with you & have a little chat catching up with everything! Just heard about you while walking through the our subdivision from Marilyn. We both had a little chat with you on Bow road days ago. I always looked at your house while walking Frankie from the duck pond to Bow road.

    Donna was the nurse at the CCSL when I started volunteering.

    XOOX
    Jerri Lynn

  3. Our sincere condolences to all the family. Many happy memories with your family from days in Edmonton and Victoria.

  4. Sorry to hear about this, it was quite unexpected. My condolences to all of you.

  5. Doug was a close and always present family friend. He and Donna regularly welcomed me into their home when my father had to travel abroad for work. I have very fond memories of incredible food, wide ranging conversations and unconditional support. Whatever a person needed, Doug was always there. We also had a lot of laughs, about things like how I drank too much orange juice before dinner, our height differential and my terrible report cards. The other thing that stands out is how incredibly strong and steadfast his love of Donna was. You don’t come across many people like Doug in your life and I’m incredibly grateful for the time we had together. I send my deepest condolences to Liz and Gene, and the rest of the Pender family in this challenging time.
    Patrick Bourke

  6. I formed a quick friendship with Doug upon meeting he and Donna last Oct. and felt the same after meeting Liz and Ron. My heart is heavy for your loss, as that is what it is.
    Please take some comfort that Brian and I will take special care of Donna whenever we can.
    Wrap yourselves in hugs.
    Helen and Brian Merritt

  7. Liz, beautiful recounting of his life. Your dad would be proud. So glad to have known him. Thinking of all of you. Lots of love xo

  8. Refreshing bio – a storied life lived… in its telling, I recognize in Ms. Liz an apple that hasn’t fallen far from the tree.
    Rest in Peace Mr Pender, Liz and Co can take it from here.
    With deepest sympathy to your family at your untimely loss.

  9. My sincere sympathy for Doug and Donna’s family. I met Donna and Doug in 2007 when Donna joined our neighbourhood volunteer group to work in our lovely local parks. Over the years, we spent many enjoyable hours working together, along with other neighbours. Doug would happen by on his walks and we’d all stop to chat with him. Even though Donna retired from park work a few years ago I would still see her out walking with Doug and we’d always stop and have a visit. Very sad to learn of Doug’s passing. Good people. Good neighbours.

  10. My sincere sympathy for Doug and Donna’s family. I met Donna and Doug in 2007 when Donna joined our neighbourhood volunteer group to work in our lovely local parks. Over the years, we spent many enjoyable hours working together, along with other neighbours. Doug would happen by on his walks and we’d all stop to chat with him. Even though Donna retired from park work a few years ago I would still see them her out walking with Doug and we’d always stop and have a visit. Very sad to learn of Doug’s passing. Good people. Good neighbours.

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